Friday Fun Bag: Is Eliah Drinkwitz a CIA Operative?

When picturing a football coach, one often imagines a large, rugged looking character. Someone who is rough around the edges and imposing in size, like Sam Pittman or Ed Orgeron. And then there’s Mizzou Coach Eliah Drinkwitz. A man who looks like he is more comfortable dabbling with Python than coaching Pigskin.

CBS Sports

Drinkwitz, who was hired as Mizzou’s head coach last year, wasted no time taking a jab at the Razorbacks during an interview in 2020 where he stated, “A school south of us kept seeming to recruit every player we offered,”

Although intentional, Drinkwitz electing to not mention the Razorbacks by name was perhaps an attempt in sparking a rivalry. This got me thinking. Maybe it wasn’t an attempt to fuel a rivalry. Maybe he’s just brainwashed.

I began a deeper investigation into his past. I already knew he graduated from Arkansas Tech. That’s when it hit me. You know who else graduated from Arkansas Tech? Sidney Gottlieb, a chemist in charge of the CIA’s mind-control program in the ‘50s and 60s. Gottlieb is most known for heading arguably the most controversial CIA project in the agency’s history, Project MKUltra.

The project focused mainly on brainwashing and mind-control methods all conducted on human subjects. The subjects consisted mostly of college students, prisoners and hospital patients. Most experiments were disguised as front organizations, leaving the subjects completely clueless as to what exactly was being done to them.

Hypnosis, verbal and sexual abuse, isolation and being administered illegal drugs such as LSD were all methods used in MKUltra. Was Drinkwitz’s “lapse in memory” comment about the Hogs a nod to a fellow Tech grad? All signs point to yes.

IIT Tech News

But Gottlieb isn’t the only CIA related connection to Drinkwitz. If he is a CIA agent that would mean he’s spent a fair amount of time in the District of Columbia. And where is Mizzou’s campus located? Columbia, Missouri. Coincidence? I think not.

If you have unfortunately been to Missouri’s campus, it’s hard not to notice nearly every building is made of concrete. Their most prized structure, the Ag Building, is made entirely of concrete and was constructed during the JFK administration. Did I also mention Sidney Gottlieb was in charge of the CIA’s assassination program in the ‘50s and ‘60s? Hmmmm. Smells fishy to me.

College of Agriculture, Food & Natural Resources: University of Missouri

But it doesn’t end there, the entrance to the Ag Building on the left is almost identical to the old U.S. Embassy’s entrance in London on the right. The government connections keep piling up.

College of Agriculture, Food & Natural Resources: University of Missouri

And still, there’s more. What’s another building constructed entirely of concrete with connections to national intelligence? The Pentagon. A place Drinkwitz would be familiar with if he were, in fact, a CIA operative. Does the feeling of once again living in an area named Columbia featuring large concrete buildings make Drinkwitz feel at home? One must think it does.

But other than being offered the head coaching position at Mizzou, what else appealed to Drinkwitz enough to convince him to leave Appalachian State the beauty of the Blue Ridge Mountains? That’s where the final clue lies that ultimately convinced me that Coach Drinkwitz is no coach at all.

Despite growing up in Arkansas, Drinkwitz was born in Norman, Oklahoma. The heart and pride of OU. Did he make a deal with the CIA that by leaving Appalachian State he could bring his hometown’s University into college football’s most prestigious conference? Obviously so. He’s been the most enthusiastic coach in the SEC about the new additions.

There’s more evidence than not that Drinkwitz isn’t a football coach, he’s a government agent. A fed. A fraud. And yet he’s still a better football coach than Chad Morris. So when we take the Battle Line trophy from Mizzou this year, we better sweep it for bugs. I got my eye on you, Agent Drinkwitz.

-BCG