Wow. There have been many groundbreaking events in the past few months. Kanye West has announced his presidential candidacy for the 2020 election; a beer company legitimately started a virus that swept the world.
But this may take the cake.
Rising senior at the University of Arkansas Ryan Bolding has announced that he will take a walk-on spot on Eric Musselman’s squad if offered. This announcement comes on the heels of Isaiah Joe re-declaring for the 2020 NBA Draft after initially revealing his plans to return for his junior season.
Regarding his announcement, Bolding said, “I’m just very blessed by this opportunity. I’m excited for the next chapter in my life. I’m most likely going to the league after this year, so I’ll probably skip practice to focus on my development in that area.”
The 5’8” Bolding is known for his signature move, the “scoop and score”, that has puzzled many defenders. The move is simply an underhand layup. Ninety-nine percent of the time, the shot gets blocked but when utilized correctly, it can puzzle many defenders. When asked about the scoop and score, NBA Hall of Fame Center Kareem Abdul-Jabbar stated, “That move is deadly. I would trade the skyhook for that masterpiece any day of the week. This kid is special.”
Bolding’s skill-set is simply standing at the three-point line, waiting for a pass. He also has a knack for setting screens (although most of the time they are, in fact, moving screens).
Hog fans can expect instant energy from Bolding, as he brings tenacity on the defensive end and has a knack for taking charges. On offense, he is very selfish and will pass the ball only when it is absolutely necessary. On his best days, he has LeBron James-like talent and on his worst days he also has Lebron James-like talent.
Bolding’s high school basketball team was ranked last in all classifications on MaxPreps.com. He did not make the squad. “Did Michael Jordan make his high school basketball team? Did he? I didn’t think so.” Bolding said in an angry rant.
Bolding last played competitive basketball in the eighth grade, averaging 0.00 points in 0.06 minutes per game. We could not find any film on him.