After he supposedly got the boot from Eric Musselman, it sounds like Ryan Bolding has found a new passion: Football Coaching.
Today, Bolding announced his candidacy for the Auburn Head Coaching job after Gus Malzahn was fired after eight years with the program.
Our sources tell us that Bolding has never coached a down of football at any level, but his success in the video game series NCAA Football has him convinced that he can coach at a Power 5 Level.
“I’ve won championships at every level, all the way from the Mountain West to the SEC” Bolding states, “If I can do it with a controller, I can do it on the field”.
The statistics do indicated that Bolding has gotten the job done at every one of his stops, compiling a 60-5 record. His offenses are considered as a high-tempo spread, but incorporate some Pro-Style sets as well. They consistently are top 5 in the country in points per game, run offense, and passing offense. His defenses, on the other hand, have been historically abysmal. “If we score more than the other team, it doesn’t really matter!” Bolding tells us that he will not hire a staff at all, because he is a ‘jack of all trades’. He seemed to indicate that he would use the rest of money on ‘bringing recruits home’.
“I don’t run it up the gut on 3rd and long, and my players don’t throw picks at the goal line! It’s better than the last coordinator they had!” Bolding said angrily, speaking about previous Auburn offensive coordinator Chad Morris.
“Honestly, I’m just worried about him,” said a friend of Bolding’s. “He’s so strange. He’s so delusional. Hopefully this article brings awareness to his issues.”
As mentioned above, there is no record indicating that Bolding has ever coached a game in real life, but this isn’t the first time we’ve seen his extreme confidence. He ‘walked on’ to Eric Musselman’s team with no experience and no real talent. He later got kicked off the team for pouring Gatorade all over Coach Musselman’s head.
Expect teams to seriously look at Ryan Bolding for coaching jobs around the country. At 21 years old, he is a real up-and-comer and the coaching carousel.
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