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The Weekend That Will Be: Week 5

Fat men love taking off shirts and expressing their love for their teams. And really, who can blame?

Crystal LoGiudice-USA TODAY Spor

We aren't supposed to wish the season away.

It's only 14 weeks long so I shouldn't whine about a weak slate of games but when you get something like this. If you're not a fan of a few select teams (Arkansas being one of those), then Gameday could be a tough one. Hopefully this will be an added benefits in the future of the playoffs. In the meantime, come on and get here you full slate of conference games.


Tennessee at No. 12 Georgia, ABC (-17 UGA)- Finally, the UT coach Butch Jones will get to show what he has built over the last two seasons "brick by brick." If not for a controversial Pig Howard fumble last season in Knoxville, Jones would have earned that signature victory fans wanted a year ago. Needless to say, no Bulldog fan in the state is overly confident this week. I tend to side with the Dawg fans with Tennessee LB A.J. Johnson having a big game in his senior season only 40 minutes from his hometown.

Vanderbilt at Kentucky, SEC Network (-17 Kentucky)- Who wants to make its home in the basement of the SEC for the remainder of the season? With the way Mark Stoops has recruited (well above UK standards) and the fact that the Commodores have looked like one of the worst SEC teams ever, take the 'Cats. Vandy wins the SEC Cellar Bowl -- by 17 points or more (?).

Afternoon (an ode to happy fat men)

Arkansas at No. 6 Texas A&M, 3:30 p.m., CBS (-9 TAMU)- Again we reach another head vs. heart Arkansas matchup. Head says, "A&M will score too many times, too quickly for the run game to catch up." Heart says, " That run game though... Keeping that ball away from those boys wanting to dink and dunk the ball around." For the sake of my terrible win prediction thus far on the season, I'm taking the long-haired Dog and her man cheerleaders to cover.

No. 1 Florida State at North Carolina State, 3:30, ABC (-18.5 FSU)- Jameis is back. That's assuming he doesn't do something stupid in the next 15 hours. Sadly for the sake of Seminole fans, this is a huge assumption. On the road after a draining win last week at home, take the Wolfpack to at least get some of those points in the spread back.

No 16. Stanford at Washington, FOX (-7.5 Stanford)- If Stanford has any shot at getting back into the conversation for a Football Final Four bid, they need to win big, which they will. Furthering my point, even Georgia State was tied with the Huskies at 14 at the half last week (before winning 45-14). Note: Those granola-eating west coasters don't make fat happy people GIFs.


Missouri at No. 13 South Carolina, ESPN 7 p.m.(-5 USC)- The Tigers will not be able to start slow for the first 3.5 quarters and finish with a strong fourth quarter as they have in their first four games. This way of play was proven unacceptable last week, losing at home to Indiana. Which South Carolina team will come to play? The first half vs. Vandy or the Georgia-game team? I like team from Columbia hosting the team from Columbia by a touchdown in the fourth.

No. 7 Baylor at Iowa State, FOX, 8 p.m. (-21 Baylor)- Jack Trice Stadium in Ames, Iowa is no stranger to an upset, beating the Bears two years ago in another prime time game. This edition of the Baylor offense is averaging 60 points per game with no #realAmericanfootball, averaging only 1.8 yards per carry.. Surprisingly though, the defense is averaging only 9 points scored against. Bears big.

Late Night

Oregon State at No. 18 Southern Cal, ESPN, 10:30 p.m. (-8.5 USC)- Losing at Boston College is hard to sit on for two weeks. Back on the West Coast, take the Trojans with the rare road cover over a less than impressive, yet undefeated, Beaver team.

Other picks

Colorado State at Boston College (-8)

North Carolina at Clemson (-14)

Duke at Miami (-6.5)

Last Week: 4-6

Season: 17-23-1 (43%)