Fooling Around On April Fools' Day

For about a week now I've been trying to come up with a shocking headline and story that would make the tusks fall out of Tusk if he were to read it. April Fools' Day comes around only once a year, so only one chance to make you go "Do What?" until you realize it is only an April Fools' Day joke of a post. In the end, I couldn't decide which headline to go with that would send Razorback nation into a red and white tizzy and hopefully a chuckle after they realized it was only a joke. I am reminded of a prank that did go too far some years ago when a group on the Vanderbilt campus put out a fake paper that said Chancellor Gordon Gee had passed away. A graduate student there at the time, I fell for that one myself and didn't think it all that funny. Those students got into deserved trouble for that one. So my headlines don't include any deaths. Just poking fun of life as a Razorback fan.

HOUSTON NUTT INVITED BACK TO JOIN RAZORBACK COACHING STAFF - Haha, I don't think that one would have been believed for a second!

UofA PHYSICISTS SAY, " ALTERNATE UNIVERSE EXISTS WHERE HOGS WON THE 1969 SHOOTOUT" - That is maybe more wishful thinking than an April Fools' Day joke. But wouldn't we all like to see that headline for real? Or would we just all feel more depressed that we are stuck in this %@#$^ universe where the Hogs lost to Texas?

TYLER WILSON DECLARES FOR SUPPLEMENTAL NFL DRAFT - Now, this one might have resulted in a few heart attacks across the state, right?

JOE ADAMS DECLARED INELIGIBLE BY NCAA FOR ENTIRE TIME AT UofA - I imagined a nice little story about how the NCAA had discovered that Joe was really a cyborg sent from the future to play for the Hogs. It was discovered during the NFL combine that he is made of titanium, steel, and powered by a small nuclear reactor. Hogs have to vacate the wins from the record book, for though Cam Newton found a loophole, there is a clearly stated no cyborg from the future clause in the NCAA rulebook. Further digging into the story, it is uncovered that Frank Broyles from 2147 sent Joe back in time. Yeah, Frank is still alive then! haha.

TEXAS A&M AND MISSOURI CHANGE THEIR MINDS, HEADED BACK TO BIG 12 - I would have written about how their athletic directors had both woken up to a cold sweat one night last week after having a nightmare vision of the future, one where they get their butts handed to them season after season in their new league. I am sure this would have gone over pretty well with Hog fans, not so well with any passing Aggie or Columbia Tiger.

OXFORD UNION INVITES NORTHWEST ARKANSAS & CENTRAL ARKANSAS FANS TO HOLD "GREAT STADIUM DEBATE." - Could you not see a whole bunch of Hog fans, all dressed in gear and doing Hog calls, walking around the centuries old Oxford campus and then entering some ancient hall to hear the pros and cons of moving all the games to Fayetteville hashed out in front of bewildered Brits? haha.

UofA ANNOUNCES FOOTBALL SERIES WITH ASU COME 2016 - This one would have turned heads, would it not? It could someday really happen. But I hope it doesn't. I like it that you don't see "Divided Family" license plates in Arkansas like I see here in Oklahoma. Let ASU exist in one universe and the Hogs in another, I say. That way all Arkansans can pull for both teams.

HOGS GET NEW NAME, "THE BILL AND HILLARY CLINTON RAZORBACKS." - Haha, yeah, that would have created a firestorm! But if you fly into Little Rock now, you will land at the "Bill and Hillary Clinton National Airport." What happened to waiting until somebody is dead before you named something after them? Well, don't ask Mike Huckabee, of the Governor Mike Huckabee Delta Rivers Nature Center! haha.

UofA TO CHARGE FOR HOG CALLS AT FUTURE GAMES - We laugh now.

I invite you to add your own April Fools' Day headlines in the comment section. I by no means mined all the material, that's for sure! Pranked or not pranked today, I hope you are having a good Sunday. Unfortunately, from what I last read, our baseball team has had a miserable weekend down in Baton Rouge. No joke.

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